“But perhaps I want to confess them. “Guineas, of course,” Mr. Why didn’t I die? Why does God hate me so? Why does He not want me? I didn’t die because I’m weak, because I am cursed! I hate this poisoned world! But most of all. This time there wasn't any doubt. If ever the denouement came—if ever the Hand reached him—Ruth would then understand why he had rebuffed all her tender advances. If you ask me, you’ll have to beat her regularly if you don’t want to live a dog’s life.
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